HundredDollarBillI think financial dominance is putting the cart before the horse.  Novice dominants often fall prey to believing in their own “get rich quick” schemes, focusing too much on short-term satisfaction and short-lived gains.  I am lucky enough to have some very generous servants who love spoiling me.  However, that desire has emerged in response to a deep and meaningful D/s dynamic.  I find that when I put positive energy into my slaves, they put positive energy back into me.  For some, it’s financial; for others, it’s professional service (carpentry, dentistry, etc).  A truly service-oriented individual takes pleasure in making their dominant happy, in the ways that they are best suited to serve.  Money is only one type of gift, and dominants that focus too obsessively on financial rewards are often missing the bigger picture.

I do keep a current Wish List on Amazon, and over the years I’ve received hundreds of gifts off the list.  I’d say 75% of those gifts came from a small group of loyal devotees who I know personally.  I see these submissives on a regular basis, though perhaps not as often as we’d like, due to practical constraints such as distance, work, family, etc.  What of the remaining 25%?  Most have come from prospective clients, who wish to stand out among the herd of hopeful emails I receive each week.  They want me to know they are legitimate about compensating me for my time, and I always appreciate this gesture.  The gift doesn’t need to be large; I simply enjoy knowing someone has gone the extra mile to make a good first impression.  Finally, there have been a handful of gifts sent from individuals who admire my site and my photos, and simply want to say thanks with a little token.  To me, forcing someone to gift you something is often unnecessary micro-management.  Owning their minds enough that they can’t help but give?  Much more interesting!  I suggest aspiring financial dominants focus first on building a clientele of quality slaves, and the gifts and tributes will follow as a natural matter of course.

Sometimes, financial dominance serves a useful function in slave training.  When faced with slaves who have problems disciplining themselves financially (or in other areas), having to earmark a portion of their income to serve my needs can be helpful.  First, it operates as a traditional form of D/s tribute that allows slaves to subsume their needs/priorities to mine.  Second, it helps them get into the habit of budgeting and thinking about where their money goes each month.  Third, it creates a fresh channel for communication between partners.  Additional communication benefits D/s relationships just as it does vanilla relationships.

As an example from my own experience, my slave mylo requested permission to take care of one of my monthly bills a few years ago.  He was having some challenges sticking to his budget, and knowing that he would be responsible for one of my utilities gave him additional incentive to plan ahead.  If he failed himself and fell behind on his own bills, no major matter.  If he failed me, on the other hand, there would be painful consequences.  He handled the task beautifully every time I asked, as I expected he would.

Alternately, I have used financial penalties as a means of corrective discipline for poor behavior or not meeting goals.  For instance, slave kelly has struggled with weight loss for many years.  I put her on an exercise schedule three days a week.  There would be a small financial penalty (I think it was $20, but it’s been a few years so I may be forgetting) for each missed exercise session.  In her case, we saw great results some months, and mediocre compliance during other months.  I could have upped the ante and charged her more, but that would have been a selfish maneuver that I felt would be ineffective.  Instead, I opted for chastity training as the next level of discipline.  Much to my amusement, she lost an inch off her waistline before the custom chastity device even arrived in the mail!

Typical “findom” approaches may be effective in the short run, netting dominants handy cash gifts to fulfill their needs in the moment.  However, to incentivize slaves towards longer term financial servitude, there should be a deeper purpose behind their service.  For the slave who takes wealth for granted, envision creative ways to use financial restrictions as a means of punishment.  Make her go out of the way to fetch her own generic coffee, instead of having the secretary deliver gourmet brew.  Ask the slave with diet challenges to skip restaurant meals for a set number of days, and make organic meals at home.  Require the slave who gambles with friends to skip the poker table tonight, and donate that money to your favorite charity in your honor.  Instead of generic, mindless “wallet raping”, I would love to see more dominants use their influence towards something positive.

This article is written by Lady Elizabeth

Financial Dominance: My Unpopular Opinion

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